Government Instituted Marriage?

Marriage reminds me of golf; it will never be mastered.  I will add that, in my 40 plus years of living, I’ve been married for 20 years.  I don’t know much about a lot of things. But I will say, based on my marriage longevity and daily seeking on improving my relationship with my wife, I feel pretty confident about knowing a little bit about this subject. One thing I know for sure is that we see what happens when the government has their hand in things.  I know I don’t want government counseling in my marriage.

Dr. Matthew D. Johnson, a psychology professor at Binghamton University in Binghamton, N.Y., and director of its Marriage and Family Studies Laboratory, writes to readers of the Christian Science Monitor (CSMonitor).  The publication explains that “The Christian Science Monitor is an independent international news organization that delivers thoughtful, global coverage." CSMonitor wants to inspire people to think about what they've read long after they've left the page, to share what they've learned with others, and to do something that makes a difference.  That being said, the “US poor need practical assistance –not marriage classes.” 

Dr. Johnson’s hope is that “Congress will reconsider the notion that campaigns to promote marriage and relationship education classes lift families out of poverty." By returning the millions spent on these failed programs to the federal welfare fund, we gain money that could be used for its original purpose: helping poor families rise out of poverty.

Dr. Johnson argues, “strong evidence [exists] that Americans value marriage regardless of income or race and that programs to teach relationship skills are ineffective.” In fact, the state of Florida commissioned a survey of all demographics regarding marriage. All categories, low, middle, and high-income families, found that respondents had the same values towards marriage.  He also quipped that the survey found “it was the wealthiest Floridians who needed an attitude change.”

The Healthy Marriage Initiative (HMI) was introduced in the 2005 Deficit Reduction Act, covertly covered within Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF).  Although some programs in the TANF are viable, in my opinion this isn’t one of them. My first response is a healthy marriage is not a poverty issue; it’s a marriage issue.

Whether you live in poverty or are wealthy, marriage is work.  I’ve spent time in the trenches of the inner cities and I've seen kids raising kids in single parent homes. The issue, I've found, isn’t whether mom and dad are getting along.  It isn't even how do we help mom and dad.  The issue is single parent families just trying to survive with teen parents in the household.   

Typically these folks don’t reside in middle/upper class suburbia. They live in the ghetto.  If you’ve never witnessed first hand what the 21^st century ghetto looks like, you don’t have to go far.  Spend a day a Dobie middle school off of Runberg.  It’s flat out scary!

The HMI program doesn't even touch this demographic. So I agree - to some extent - with the author.  We should look at re-allocating some of the funds to help specific demographics like Dobie. There need to be programs more pliable to their current needs.  These families don’t meet the criteria of the first sentence of the HMI mission statement, “To help couples, who have chosen marriage for themselves."